DAILY UPDATE: AUGUST 3

Nikolina is off, John is on for her, I'm on for John. That means I have a duty to bring you the juicyness that you depend on everyday! So here we go...

J-SIMPSON...SO YA ACT DUMB LIKE 'EHHH, DUH!'
We haven't heard much idiocy from JESSICA SIMPSON for quite some time. But I am happy to report, IT HAS RETURNED.

The other day on Twitter, Jessica said, quote, "[I] love it when the lyric of a song asks me a question."
Then, her next post read, quote, "Is 'asks' even a word? If not, sorry 4 my layziness with grammar."

Notice not only the fact that Jess isn't sure whether "asks" is a word...but also the spelling of "layziness".

Is Jessica one of those women who thinks guys like DUMB BLONDES? Because if you think about it, she hasn't said many stupid things since she started dating TONY ROMO. But now that she's single, she's a ditz again. Is this how she attracts men? Would it work on you? And if it DID work on you, would you later dump her if you ever found out she actually had a brain?





OHIO SNOOPERS...
The three Belmont County, Ohio men who allegedly broke into the home of SARAH JESSICA PARKER and MATTHEW BRODERICK'S surrogate mother pleaded NOT GUILTY to the charges on Friday.

The men...two of whom are POLICE CHIEFS...are facing a total of 10 felonies between them. They were supposedly digging for information to sell to the tabloids. The surrogate gave birth to twin girls, Marion and Tabitha, last month.





DREW BARRYMORE...SHE CAN RIDE MY FIN!
DREW BARRYMORE loves dolphins so much, she's got images and statues of them all over her house. But she takes her love even further than that. According to the "National Enquirer", she actually thinks she used to BE one.

A so-called "friend" says that Drew once told her, quote, "They are just really special creatures and highly evolved. To tell you the truth, I'm convinced I was a dolphin in another life and that's why I'm so attracted to them."





BREAKING: VH1 (CLOSE TO) NABBING K-FED FOR REALITY SHOW!!!!
KEVIN FEDERLINE began filming the pilot of his new reality show last week. There's still no official line on the series...but it sounds like it'll be a VH1 show, which will also star his new girlfriend, VICTORIA PRINCE.

It may also feature his two kids with BRITNEY SPEARS...three-year-old SEAN PRESTON and two year-old JAYDEN JAMES.)

K-Fed reportedly shot at least two scenes in Las Vegas...one at the Hard Rock Hotel's pool...and another at a Vegas club, where he and Victoria were partying.






CHILI PEPPERS REUNION
The RED HOT CHILI PEPPERS hiatus is coming to an end. The band...who have been on a break for about two years now...will be reuniting in October. Initially, the Peppers planned on stepping away for, quote, "a minimum of one year."

Drummer CHAD SMITH says, quote, "That's the plan. Everybody was like, 'Y'know, I really like having this time off, not being a Chili Pepper and doing other things. [But] it'll be two years in September, so now we're ready.

"You can't force people to play when they don't want to play or aren't ready to play or whatever...not in our band, anyway."

Chad expects guitarist JOHN FRUSCIANTE and bassist FLEA to come back with a few song ideas...but they'll also do a lot of "improvising and jamming". He says, quote, "Songs will come out of that. That's what we usually do."





DRAKE FALL DOWN AND GO BOOM
A few weeks ago, DRAKE tore his ACL and doctors advised him NOT to perform on the America's Most Wanted tour.

That tour...which also features LIL WAYNE, Young Jeezy, Soulja Boy and Jeremih...will hit Blossom on Thursday. But Drake decided to ignore his doctors...and perform a short set at each show.

Well, that wasn't a smart move. On Friday night...during the tour's stop in Camden, New Jersey...Drake collapsed onstage, after his knees buckled underneath him. He had to be carried offstage and didn't return.

Lil Wayne, who was onstage with Drake, finished the show on his own.

TMZ has video: http://www.tmz.com/videos?autoplay=true&mediaKey=5868e9ea-df60-4531-a75a-7e4a1c930469

And a longer vid: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YyUKNntx-z0





YAWNING DURING SEX?
I've yawned during work. Just did actually. But I can honestly say I don't believe I have ever yawned during sex! Well, apparently its a GOOD thing if you do?!
Dr. Robert Provine is a neuroscientist at the University of Maryland, and he's spent a lot of time studying the chemistry behind yawning.

According to Dr. Provine, quote, "[A yawn] serves a number of functions, but a common feature in all is that it's associated with a change of state, a shift, say, from sleep to wakefulness, [or from] wakefulness to sleep."

Or, in this case, yawning is your body's way of transitioning from NOT being aroused to being completely TURNED ON.




CLEVELAND CLINIC SAYS REDHEADS FEEL MORE PAIN!
I feel bad for my friend Barb, who has red hair. According to a new study, redheads are twice as likely as blondes and brunettes to avoid going to the dentist. So why do redheads hate going to the dentist so much?

Well, it's not entirely clear. But researchers from the Cleveland Clinic think it has to do with the fact that redheads actually feel MORE PAIN than blondes and brunettes. (???)

In fact, a study in 2004 found that, on average, redheads need 20% more general anesthesia than people with blonde, brown or black hair.

A guy named Dr. Daniel Sessler led the study. He says, quote, "Redheads are sensitive to pain. They require more generalized, localized anesthesia. The conventional doses fail.

"[Redheads] have bad experiences at the dentist and because of the bad experiences, they could avoid dental care."

So why do redheads feel more pain? Well, it has something to do with the gene that produces melanin, which is a substance that gives skin, hair and eyes their color.




TAYLOR SWIFT HITS THE BIG SCREEN
TAYLOR SWIFT is set to hit the big screen once again. TAYLOR has joined the cast of the new movie, "Valentine's Day," set for release in 2010.
This is her second appearance on film, as she also had a small part in "Hannah Montana: The Movie" earlier this year.

According to MTV NEWS, GARRY MARSHALL is directing the film, which "follows five interconnected stories set in LOS ANGELES on VALENTINE's DAY."

The movie also stars JULIA ROBERTS, EMMA ROBERTS, ASHTON KUTCHER, JENNIFER GARNER, JESSICA ALBA, JESSICA BIEL, BRADLEY COOPER, PATRICK DEMPSEY and more.