JOHN DUMPED HER VIA E-MAIL?

Now that there's texting, e-mail seems so old-school.  So I guess this makes JOHN MAYER an old-fashioned HEEL... 

"Us Weekly" claims that John dumped KATY PERRY by e-mail...because he was, "tired of her hard partying."

A source adds, "She was furious and really hurt.  She was into him, but he wasn't feeling it."

Another source says that Katy is trying to land ROBERT PATTINSON.  They've been friends for years, but last week they went to dinner together where they were, quote, "nestled close [and] flirting."

T SWEEZY NEWS

According to the "New York Post", TAYLOR SWIFT was missing her boyfriend CONOR KENNEDY so much, she sent her private jet to Massachusetts to whisk him down to Nashville.

A source said, "Taylor missed Conor so much, she sent a plane for him a few days [after she left.]  He's been with her ever since, and his family doesn't know when he will be back.

"Things have become so serious between them so fast that no one in Hyannis Port would be surprised if they eloped."

One more thing about Taylor and Conor:  Taylor admits in the September 13th issue of "Rolling Stone" that she did look into buying a house near the Kennedy compound.  She said, "That would be so amazing."

CARRIE UNDERWOOD/IDOL

Last we heard "American Idol" was trying to work out a deal for either KEITH URBAN or BRAD PAISLEY to be a judge for this season. CARRIE UNDERWOOD says that's a good move, simply because the audience seems to want it.

She said, "I do think it would be wise to have a country person be a judge. You look at the track record of'American Idol', and there's me and SCOTTY [MCCREERY] and LAUREN [ALAINA] who were the final two.

"There's obviously a want for it from the audience because that's who they are voting for.  So, it makes sense they would have somebody they know and love in as a judge."

Other country performers who came out of "Idol" include Kellie Pickler, Josh Gracin, Bucky Covington, Casey James, Danny Gokey

SOUNDS WE LIKE, SOUNDS WE HATE

A British theme park asked people what sounds they like the most . . . and which ones they hate.  Here are the ten sounds we LIKE the most:       

#1.)  Waves crashing against rocks.

#2.)  Rain hitting against windows.

#3.)  The sound of people walking in snow.

#4.)  Babies laughing.

#5.)  Birds chirping.

#6.)  A fire crackling.

#7.)  People laughing.

#8.)  Leaves crunching beneath your feet.

#9.)  Cats purring.

#10.)  Church bells in the distance.

--And here are the ten sounds we HATE the most:

#1.)  Nails on a chalkboard.

#2.)  Someone throwing up.

#3.)  A car alarm.

#4.)  A dentist's drill.

#5.)  Someone spitting.

#6.)  A yappy dog.

#7.)  Screaming babies or children.

#8.)  Someone talking with their mouth full.

#9.)  Teeth grinding.

#10.)  A knife grinding on a plate.

TOP LIES FOR MEN AND WOMEN

A new survey figured out the top five lies men tell, and the top five lies women tell.  Check 'em out . . .

--The Top Five Lies Men Tell:

#1.)  "I didn't have that much to drink."

#2.)  "Nothing's wrong, I'm fine."

#3.)  "I didn't have phone reception."

#4.)  "It wasn't that expensive."

#5.)  "I'm on my way."

--The Top Five Lies Women Tell:

#1.)  "Nothing's wrong, I'm fine."

#2.)  "I don't know where it is, I didn't touch it."

#3.)  "It wasn't that expensive."

#4.)  "I didn't have that much to drink."

#5.)  "I have a headache."

--The survey also found men tell about one lie more per day than women, three to two. 

WE ALL THINK WE'RE GREAT DRIVERS!
I'm about to sum up everything that's wrong with this country in one sentence.  According to a new survey by Ford, 99% of Americans believe they're safe drivers.

And right now, you're probably thinking, "Man, people are delusional.  But I really AM a safe driver." That's exactly what WE thought when we saw the story.  But we're just as delusional as everyone else.  Here's why . . .

Even though 99% of us say we're safe drivers, 76% admit to eating while driving, 55% go over the speed limit,54% talk on their phones without a hands-free device, 37% drive tired, and 25% look through their phone while they drive.

The survey didn't ask people if they text and drive, or drink and drive.

REASONS ROMANCE SHOULD BE DEAD?

If you try to make a grand romantic gesture, and almost die in the process, does that make it more romantic? Or less romantic?  For this guy's sake, let's say MORE.

This month, in Chongqing in southern China, a man named Hu Seng decided to surprise his girlfriend by having his friend seal him in a CARDBOARD BOX, then had him delivered to her place by a courier.

There was only one problem.  He didn't poke holes in the box for air, because he was afraid they'd ruin the surprise.

The courier service didn't realize there was a man in the box, and it took them three hours to deliver him, instead of the 30 minutes Hu expected.  So by the time Hu's girlfriend opened it, he'd PASSED OUT.

But paramedics came and were able to revive him.

CHRIS BROWN/RIHANNA REUNION??

There was a rumor going around that CHRIS BROWN and RIHANNA were planning some kind of "major reunion" at the "MTV Video Music Awards" next Thursday.

But it isn't happening.  Chris' rep tells GossipCop.com, "He will not be at the 'VMAs' in any capacity."

For what it's worth, PerezHilton.com claims Chris IS...or at least WAS..."scheduled" to attend the ceremony.  The site also quoted some so-called FRIENDS of Rihanna and Chris who seemed to think they'd be down for a reunion.

Rihanna WILL be at the "VMAs".  She'll perform...as will One Direction, Taylor Swift, Pink, Green Day and Frank Ocean. Demi Lovato will perform during the pre-show.

WHAT WE HATE SPENDING MONEY ON

We've got the results of a new poll about things we hate spending money on, and one thing is clear. We hate spending money on weddings, we hate spending money on bills...but we REALLY hate spending money on our SIGNIFICANT OTHERS.

The NUMBER ONE thing people hate spending on is...buying things for their husbands, wives, girlfriends, or boyfriends.  Here's the full top 10:

#1.)  Buying things for our significant others.

#2.)  Your own wedding costs.

#3.)  Buying wedding presents for other people.

#4.)  BIRTH CONTROL.  Although it's a lot cheaper than the alternative.

#5.)  Retirement contributions.

#6.)  Bachelor or bachelorette parties.

#7.)  Utility bills.

#8.)  Work clothes.

#9.)  Car insurance.

#10.)  The dentist.

Things that finished just outside the top 10 are throwing in for a coworker's birthday present or card, grocery bags, gas, and tolls.

GOOD DRIVER...BAD DRIVER

Each year, Allstate Insurance ranks the drivers in almost 200 American cities. Here are the ten cities with the most dangerous drivers...and the safest.      

The cities with the most dangerous drivers are:

#1.)  Washington, D.C.:  Drivers in D.C. get in an accident every 4.7 years.  The national average is one accident every 10 years.

#2.)  Baltimore:  Every 5.3 years. 

#3.)  Providence, Rhode Island:  5.5 years.

#4.)  Hialeah, Florida:  5.6 years.

#5.)  Glendale, California:  5.6 years.

#6.)  Philadelphia, Pennsylvania:  6.1 years.

#7.)  Alexandria, Virginia:  6.2 years.

#8.)  Newark, New Jersey:  6.3 years. 

#9.)  Miami, Florida:  6.3 years.

#10.)  San Francisco, California:  6.5 years.

And here are the ten cities with the SAFEST drivers:

#1.)  Sioux Falls, South Dakota:  Drivers there get in an accident every 13.8 years.  The U.S. average is one accident every 10 years.

#2.)  Boise, Idaho:  13.8 years. 

#3.)  Fort Collins, Colorado:  13.6 years.

#4.)  Madison, Wisconsin:  13.0 years.

#5.)  Lincoln, Nebraska:  12.4 years.

#6.)  Huntsville, Alabama:  12.4 years.

#7.)  Chandler, Arizona:  12.3 years.

#8.)  Reno, Nevada:  12.3 years.

#9.)  Knoxville, Tennessee:  12.2 years.

#10.)  Springfield, Missouri:  12.1 years. 

Akron and Cleveland BOTH finish BELOW average. Cleveland is #64, Akron is #58

ARE YOU SMARTER THAN THE AVERAGE...

Here's a quick technology lesson to make sure you're smarter than HALF the country.  When you hear about "the cloud" in technology, it just refers to you storing or backing up your data online, not just on your computer.

It has nothing to do with clouds in the sky.  In a new survey, 51% of Americans said they believe that stormy weather will interfere with "the cloud."

IS YOUR PET RIGHT OR LEFT HANDED?

This sounds pretty stupid, but you're totally going to do it. Dr. Stefanie Schwartz is a vet in Tustin, California.  And she says she's come up with a test you can use to figure out whether your dog or cat is LEFT-HANDED or RIGHT-HANDED.

Not that there's any real benefit in finding out.  Whether a dog or cat is left-handed or right-handed doesn't have any impact on their life.  But don't you kinda want to know anyway?  Here's the test.

#1.)  Fill a toy with treats, then put it in the center of your pet's field of vision.  Which paw does he use to touch it first?

#2.)  Put something sticky on their nose and see which paw they use to remove it.

#3.)  Put a treat under the sofa just out of their reach, and see which paw they use to try to get it out.

Schwartz says you have to perform those tests 100 TIMES to get a definitive answer, especially with cats who sometimes mess around and use both paws.  But if one paw is dominating your results before 100, that's your pet's dominant paw.

CLEANING THE ENVIRONMENT THRU PEE
In Taiwan, the environmental protection minister says we could help heal the environment by . . . having MEN SIT DOWN TO PEE.  He says all the splatter from standing has bad environmental effects because it creates a toxic environment that requires chemicals to clean it up.  Taiwan can't FORCE men to sit, of course...but they are putting signs in public bathrooms encouraging it.

BIEBER DEATH THREATS

A while back, a JUSTIN BIEBER fan named Marlene McHammel asked Justin...on video...if he was a BREAST MAN or a BUTT MAN. 

She actually whispered it in Justin's ear, but she was loud enough to be heard on the video. And she didn't say "breasts" and "butt".  She used the "T&A" words, if you know what I mean and I'm sure you do.

Justin seemed stunned by the question, and didn't answer.

Well, Marlene got to meet Justin AGAIN a little while later and asked him if he was mad at her.  He said, "I'm not upset about that question, I swear."

She also revealed that she's been getting DEATH THREATS because of the video, and Justin asked fans to leave her alone.

Oh, and he also finally answered the question.  He said, "I like both."

Here's the video. 

JESSICA SIMPSON NEEDS IT NOW!

ERIC JOHNSON is seeing the benefits of JESSICA SIMPSON'S weight loss effort...in the form of COITUS.

After gaining 70 pounds during her pregnancy and then giving birth, there was a pretty bad drought.  But now that Jessica is dropping the pounds, she's reclaiming her status as SEXUAL NAPALM.

A source says, "[She's] thanking him with a string of X-rated romps...and telling everyone!  [Jessica] talks about it nonstop.  They haven't had sex in a while, and she's definitely making up for lost time."

REALLY?
What ANYONE sees in this guy, I do not know.

RUSSELL BRAND is reportedly nailing GERI HALLIWELL...a.k.a. GINGER SPICE.

A source says, "Things are getting very serious between them...they're a proper couple now.  They had met several times in the past, but really got to know each other during the Olympics.

"They just clicked...they have so much in common."  (Russell is 37...Geri is 40.)

DEMI LOVATO

20-year-old DEMI LOVATO only has ONE qualification to be a judge on "X Factor": She can help other young kids who are trying to find success as teenagers.

Perhaps the show has realized this, because they're tweaking the judges' responsibilities this season, so that the categories are based more on AGE than gender.

Sources say that Demi will mentor the youngest contestants...boys and girls between the ages of 12 and 16.  BRITNEY SPEARS will work with the 17- to 24-year-olds...and L.A. REID is taking all contestants 25 and older.

That means, SIMON COWELL is handling the GROUPS this year.

Last season, Simon had the young girls...L.A. took the young boys...NICOLE SCHERZINGER took the singers 25 and older...and PAULA ABDUL handled the groups, although she didn't do too well at that.

As for Demi, if you're going to have younger contestants on the show, then putting a lot more attention on how you handle them is a smart move. 

Don't be too surprised to see Demi Lovato on stage holding the hand of her kids to support them through the heartache of their eliminations too.

HIGHEST-PAID CELEBS

Forbes.com has released its list of the Highest-Paid Celebrities...and for the fourth straight year, OPRAH WINFREY tops it. She banked $165 million between May of 2011 and May of this year.

Here are the Top 21, along with their earnings over the past year . . .

#1.)  Oprah Winfrey,  $165 million

#2.)  "Transformers" director Michael Bay,  $160 million

#3.)  Steven Spielberg,  $130 million

#4.)  "Pirates of the Caribbean" producer Jerry Bruckheimer,  $115 million

#5.)  Dr. Dre,  $110 million

#6.)  Tyler Perry,  $105 million

#7.)  Howard Stern,  $95 million

#8.)  Author James Patterson,  $94 million

#9.)  (tie)  George Lucas and Simon Cowell,  $90 million

#11.)  (tie)  Glenn Beck and Elton John,  $80 million

#13.)  Tom Cruise,  $75 million

#14.)  "Law & Order" creator Dick Wolf,  $70 million

#15.)  Rush Limbaugh,  $69 million

#16.)  Boxer Manny Pacquiao,  $67 million

#17.)  Dr. Phil,  $64 million

#18.)  Donald Trump,  $63 million

#19.)  Ryan Seacrest,  $59 million

#20.)  (tie)  Britney Spears and Tiger Woods,  $58 million

TO ME, THIS IS NOT OKAY!

This is definitely NOT a ringing endorsement of trust in relationships today.  But it IS a ringing endorsement of always taking your phone with you to the bathroom.

According to a new survey, ONE THIRD of people say it's totally fine to read your partner's texts or emails if they're acting suspiciously.

37% of women say they'd have no issues with digging through their significant other's texts and emails if they thought he might be cheating.  Men were less likely to be okay with prying...only 29% say it's fine.

The survey also found that only 41% of people 18 to 34 say it's fine to date more than one person at the same time.  People over 55 were most likely to have no problem with the idea of dating multiple people.

PARENTS AND CELL PHONES

According to a new survey by a technology company called Asurion, your kids don't know how to take care of their cell phone.      

The average parent said they have to replace their kid's cell phone more than once a year . . . for EACH of their kids.  They estimate that a replacement phone will cost $200...but it's closer to $600.

In the same survey, the kids didn't think they broke their phones quite as often as their parents said they did...but 48% of high school and college students admit that they've lost or broken their phone within the last two years.

27% of the phone accidents took place at school...24% at home...15% were outside...and 14% were at a friend's house.

35% of the phones were broken while running or doing physical activity...18% of the kids were near water when the accident occurred...18% were cleaning...and 17% were playing a sport.

PRINCE HARRY DUMPED

No surprise here: PRINCE HARRY appears to be single again. Sources say Harry's girlfriend Cressida Bonas was HUMILIATED by the pictures of his nude carousing with other women in Vegas, so she DUMPED him.

Sources also say Harry got cussed out both by his dad, PRINCE CHARLES, and his grandmother QUEEN ELIZABETH.

Meanwhile, the porno company Vivid Entertainment played their usual game of grabbing publicity from scandals like this by offering Harry a gig in one of their movies.  The offer?  $10 million.

3 HOURS!?

According to a survey by the St. Ives makeup company, the average woman spends more than three hours getting her hair and makeup ready before going out.      

That adds up to about 43 weeks over the course of her life...or almost full 11 months.

One in three women say that they wish they could spend less time doing makeup. Of course that ALSO means that TWO in three women are fine with burning a couple hours on it whenever they want to go out.

One in eight women say they would NEVER go out with no makeup on...and 1% of women say they even do their makeup before going to the gym.

Women don't just spend time working on their appearance in front of a mirror. 8% of women say they spend at least 30 minutes a week changing pictures of themselves on Facebook. 

BUSTING MYTHS

Make yourself as HAIRLESS as you want.  Your hair DOESN'T actually grow back thicker, darker, or coarser.

The hair seems coarser when you shave because stubble is shorter...obviously...and hair gets softer as it gets longer.  The hair seems darker because you're seeing it against your skin instead of other hair.

And the hair seems thicker because...well, that's just your imagination.  Shaving doesn't stimulate the hair follicles or anything like that.

RETURN OF THE MACK

Fitting since I'm BACK on Monday...perhaps more fitting as its been quite awhile since I've posted a new one of these!

WHILE I WAS GONE...
Katy Perry dumped John Mayer and turned down Idol
Nicki Minaj/Idol rumors
Chad Kroeger got engaged to Avril Lavigne (imagine the offspring...)
Speaking of offspring, Snooki dropped one!
The US lost one as Neil Armstrong passed on

Here's some other stuff!


NEW ONE DIRECTION THIS FALL
The next ONE DIRECTION album is coming out in November. There's no title or release date yet. The first single "Live While We're Young" is scheduled to come out on October 1st.

It's been less than six months since One Direction's debut album "Up All Night" came out in the U.S. It was originally released in the U.K. last November.

"Up All Night" has sold 1.1 million copies in the U.S. in 2012, which makes it the second-biggest selling album of the year. ADELE'S album "21" is the #1. It has sold 3.9 million copies this year.

Speaking of One Direction, ZAYN MALIK angrily shut down his Twitter account on Tuesday...and that lasted TWO WHOLE DAYS.

He returned yesterday...Tweeting, quote, "Sorry, I was getting some abuse on Twitter but I don't want to let my fans down. So I am back!! :)"

WHAT'S WRONG WITH BRITNEY SPEARS?
BRITNEY SPEARS is still under her conservatorship after four and a half years...and there's a good reason for that.

Britney's people filed papers this week asking the judge in the conservatorship case to seal certain "highly sensitive" records that could cause Britney, "irreparable harm and immediate danger."

Sources say these records have to do with a SERIOUS MEDICAL ISSUE that prevents Britney from consistently making sound decisions.

Whatever this disorder is, it affects Britney's personality and state of mind...and while she's currently doing, quote, "extremely well", she still needs that safety net.

MAKING A HOUSE A HOME

When you move into a new place, it takes a while until it feels like home. And for a lot of us, apparently a place doesn't feel like home until we've walked around NAKED.

In a new survey, the average person says it takes about two months and six days at a new place before it feels like home.

And one of the biggest signs that yes, you're at home is...walking around naked. Check out the other four signs...

Putting out a welcome mat.

Falling asleep on the couch.

Having a housewarming party.

And putting up photos of your friends and family.






WHAT'S THE POINT?
Remember this the next time you're debating whether to spend a few extra thousand dollars to get a convertible. There's a REALLY good chance you'll NEVER take advantage of it.

According to a new survey of convertible owners, 64% say they never or almost never put the top down. That means there's about a two-thirds chance the convertible feature of your convertible will go to waste.

But...that may not even be why you're buying the car. The survey found that 46% of people said they picked a convertible for its LOOKS more than the idea of driving around with the top down.

Overall, women are more likely than men to drive with the top down. Men are also more likely than women to say they NEVER put the top down.





TAYLOR SWIFT: WEDDING CRASHER
It's official: TAYLOR SWIFT'S song "We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together" set a record for the biggest digital sales week ever for a song by a female artist. It sold 623,000 copies last week, and is number one on the "Billboard" Digital Songs chart.

It's also the second-largest sales in a week overall, behind "Right Round"...by FLO RIDA. He did that back in February of 2009.

TAYLOR and her boyfriend CONOR KENNEDY were asked to STAY AWAY from a Kennedy family wedding last Saturday...but they went anyway. It was the wedding of Conor's cousin, Kyle Kennedy.

Conor WAS invited, but he never RSVP'd...and then he decided he wanted to go...AND bring Taylor.

The bride's mother, Victoria Gifford Kennedy, told the"Boston Herald", "They texted me an hour before the wedding and asked if they could come. I responded with a very clear, 'Please do not come.' They came anyway."

Naturally, Taylor's appearance in the hotel lobby caused all kinds of chaos...with fans asking for pictures and autographs.

Victoria was not pleased. She said, "I personally went up to Ms. Swift, whose entrance distracted the entire event, politely introduced myself to her, and asked her as nicely as I could to leave.

"It was like talking to a ghost. She seemed to look right past me."

Somehow, Conor and Taylor finally got the message that they weren't welcome so they left and got some dinner elsewhere. But then they CAME BACK later and spent the night dancing at the reception.

Which means either Conor and Taylor are oblivious to the needs of others...or the mother of the bride simply did not make it crystal clear about them staying away.

Anyway, a spokeswoman for Taylor is calling foul. She told "The Herald", "There is no truth to that. Taylor was invited to the wedding and the bride thanked her profusely for being there."

I'm going with the mother of the bride on this one. I can totally understand her not wanting any distractions on her daughter's big day. Especially considering this is the Kennedy family and the last thing they need is publicity.

Plus, Taylor's people are paid to say things that will make her look good.



TAYLOR ON VH1 STORYTELLERS, PLUS PINK
TAYLOR SWIFT, ALICIA KEYS and PINK will get their own "VH1 Storytellers" episodes this fall.

They will debut on consecutive nights in November. Taylor will be featured on November 11th...Alicia Keys' episode premieres on the 12th...and Pink's follows on the 13th.

Btw, Taylor's "VH1 Storytellers" performance will take place at a SCHOOL, and she's holding a contest to determine which one gets it.

If you're a student, you can vote for your high school or college at TaylorSwiftOnCampus.com...from now through September 23rd. The Top Five schools will receive a $10,000 grant for their music department.



STATUS SYMBOLS
An appliance company called De'Longhi asked people to pick the top ten status symbols they want in their home. Check out the results . . .


#1.) Hot tub.

#2.) Walk-in closet: This was the top choice for WOMEN.

#3.) Side-by-side refrigerator-freezer. (They're not common in the U.K., where the study was done. And they call them 'U.S.-style fridges.' Who knew?)

#4.) A stereo system with speakers in every room: That was top choice for MEN.

#5.) 3-D television.

#6.) Sound-activated blinds and lights.

#7.) Restaurant-style range stove.

#8.) Fancy coffee maker.

#9.) Temperature-controlled wine cellar.

#10.) Gas grill.


In the 1990s we wanted: A black dining room table and chairs...a breadmaker...and beige carpeting.

In the '80s we had to have: A Commodore 64 computer...an avocado-colored bathroom...a garbage disposal...and a microwave.

In the '70s people wanted: A fondue set...a Betamax...color TV...and a minibar.






VANESSA HUDGENS: STRIPPER
Remember her? She was on one of the Disney shows, and had a hit song back in 2006. She plays a stripper in the upcoming thriller "Frozen Ground", with Nicolas Cage and John Cusack. And judging by the photos that appeared online from a leaked trailer, she went for it.
http://egotastic.com/2012/08/vanessa-hudgens-stripper-stllls-from-frozen-ground-too-hot-for-youtube-just-right-for-us-video/




COLLEGE FRESHMAN
Beloit College in Wisconsin just released their annual list of the things that incoming college freshmen are too young to know about. You know...the list that makes you want to SHRIVEL up and DIE of OLD AGE.

This year's freshmen are the class of 2016, so they were born in...1994. Yep. We'll just let that sink in for a second. Now, check out 18 things they're too young to know about:

#1.) For them, KURT COBAIN, JACKIE O, and RICHARD NIXON have ALWAYS been dead.


#2.) They know ROBERT DE NIRO as Greg Focker's father-in-law, not a mobster.


#3.) They've never used an actual airline ticket.


#4.) They've never had to carry their luggage, they've always rolled it.


#5.) The NFL has ALWAYS played in Jacksonville...and NEVER in Los Angeles.


#6.) They don't know why they click an icon with a picture of a floppy disk to save files.


#7.) The Secretary of State has almost always been a woman.


#8.) They think of BILL CLINTON as an elder statesman.


#9.) Women have been flying space shuttles and fighter jets the entire time they've been alive.


#10.) They've never had to use an encyclopedia.


#11.) They've always had BLUE M&Ms...and NEVER had tan ones.


#12.) They've never known life without the History Channel.


#13.) "The Real World" has ALWAYS been on the air.


#14.) They know MIKE MYERS as the voice of "Shrek", not 'Wayne' . . . and EDDIE MURPHY has always been 'Donkey', not a "Beverly Hills Cop".


#15.) Little Caesar's has been doing "Pizza Pizza" for their WHOLE LIFE.


#16.) They have no recollection of ARIANNA HUFFINGTON being a conservative.


#17.) Quoting the "Royale with cheese" from "Pulp Fiction" doesn't resonate with them.


#18.) LOU GEHRIG never had the record for most consecutive games played in their lifetime...since CAL RIPKEN broke it the year after they were born.





TWITTER
A company called Vertaline scanned millions of tweets a day to try to figure out which cities are most polite...and which are the rudest.

They tracked the use of two phrases on Twitter..."Good morning" and "[eff] off"...to see which cities said each one most often.

The city most likely to wish you good morning on Twitter is...Lubbock, Texas. Los Angeles says it a lot too.

And even though there's an old cliché about New Yorkers being rude, they tweet "Good morning" more often than people in the South.

The city most likely to tell you to "[eff] off" on Twitter is...Buffalo, New York. Los Angeles ALSO says that a lot... and so does Dallas.